Inspiration Lost

This will not be the first, nor the last. But have you ever felt stuck ? Have you felt you have a thousand dreams, a million wishes but lack the desire to even try to achieve one ? Have you felt lost in path although you are living your life like you did a year ago or may be years ago. At this point, you must be thinking well what is he talking about ? I feel like that a lot of times in a day if not all the time.

You may be wondering if I have a lot going on in my life. You bet, but that lot going on is a good lot. Me and my wife were blessed with a our second child just 4 months ago. So you know the drill, I am not going to bore you with the sleepless nights, busy day etc… If you need more info and if you don’t have a kid, just talk to one of your friends. You will get the picture. Anyway back to where I was, so shouldn’t I be rejoicing ? I have a good job, family, friends so what is the issue ? You may even call it a first world problem. To explain this, I have a 30–30–30–10 rule. You see I am engineer, so well we as engineers always try to get everything using logic. So let me bulletize (not a real word) my life logic of how we should spend our time roughly. To be fair these are approximations and will keep changing depending on the day. So overall you want this split.

1. 30% of time in profession, well this brings bread home
2. 30% time in Social which includes your parents, relatives and friends
3. 30% time for personal stuff which includes your partner, kids, Alright add your pets here as well.
4. 10% time is yours and only yours. This my time is absolutely necessary to achieve your personal goals and dreams. This is your passion time.

As you would have figured out from earlier ranting, I am not able to do the last 10%. I would love to pin the blame on being a parent for two kids, but deep down, I know it is not true. That is because I still manage to watch 4–5 hours of TV every week. Then what is the issue ? You see the “my time” needs a drive, passion that just makes you yearn for that 10% time to do things that you love. But I simply lost it, I simply lost my inspiration. You can now tell me, start watching Steve Jobs’ Stanford speech, etc… The simple fact is Inspiration comes from within. It may be amplified or sourced from outside. But it has to come from deep inside for us to sustain that inspiration to do things.
Now you may be wondering, why I am even talking about all this ? May be I want to just share, may be I want to be told that this is fine. Friends, everything that is lost can be found especially if it is within our mind. I am hoping to rediscover myself. If you are in the same situation as mine and was hoping I would provide some solution, I am sorry to say I don’t have any. I am simply talking it out. On second thought, May be this is the first step in finding that lost inspiration again … finding my path towards my forgotten dreams. Now that I talked it out, I kind of feel better. So let us see where I go from here… Adios till next time…